My Bird’s Been Shot

I haven’t told you guys what great news happened while I was at my job a couple nights ago! There was a couple that came in that were very impressed with my customer service and they offered me a job with much better perks than I have currently. They told me that they would talk to their manager and try to get me an interview and of course, I jumped onboard for it. I mean if you have the audacity to come on my JOB and offer me a new position, SOMETHING has to be good about it. 😉

So he just called me tonight to see if I was still interested in coming to see what they were all about and I am….until I found out it was out by UCF. I will admit…I wasn’t really listening when he was telling me where they were and what position they were willing to hire me for (I was still high on “eh mah gawd, i just got interviewed on my job!!!” lol.

But now my heart’s a little heavy because if the position IS that far out by UCF then I have NO reason to accept that job because it’s waaaay too far. I’m hoping deep down it’s one of those things where this is where they will interview at and NOT where the actual position will be. I don’t know what I was thinking when I said “okay, I’ll be there”. But… I can’t be there. And it’s gonna KILL me to tell that man that I can’t accept that job because it’s too far out for me to come out.

But I’m hoping, I have a “little” bit of hope that I’m wrong. Because, I told them I was in school and they know where I work so why would they offer me a job that was so far out of the way? I dunno, but if it is where the position is number one, I WILL be pissed. And number 2, waaaay too depressed to even think about therapy.

You know why? Because THIS was gonna be the job that would’ve created an outlet for me. It could’ve been the job to help me get a car, to help me get my bucket list ideas out, to help me CHANGE. And I have no way to get there……….UGGGGGGGGH GAAAAAAAAAAWD!

I’m so over having to pass up great oppurtunities because I have no way to get there.

You know…I know I said I would use that financial aid disbursement to get a computer which I kinda need for class….but I may turn around and get a car with it. So sick of “not having the means to get there” and having to rely on everyone else to help me get there. Man I don’t want to tell that man I can’t accept that position but hey…it may not have even been legit. It may have been just as cruddy as the job I have now.

Awww who am I kidding, I could’ve had something great! 😦 *pouting*




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